You Have What Is Called A Penis

When I was 7 or 8 years old I used to be very fidgety and could not sit still. Nor did I ever want to go to the bathroom when I was having fun. I played t-ball at the time and I was placed in the outfield because I had a good arm. Whenever I had to go to the bathroom, I'd cross my legs, lean back and forth, turn around, jump up and down, grabbing and holding my penis, all sorts of gyrations. My Dad called it the "Doo-Doo Dance".

After several occurrences of this, my Dad got fed up with me and decided to have "The Talk" with me. So he invited me up to his bedroom. I knew it was serious because we were never allowed in my parents bedroom unless it was an emergency. He sat me down on the edge of the bed, sat down next to me, and began to explain to me the purpose of my penis. First he told me that it was called a 'penis'. Then he explained that it was inappropriate to grab it in public. I don't remember much else from the conversation. But after learning what it was called, I started calling my older sister a 'penis' every chance I could get. That only lasted a day or two until she told my Mom to tell me to stop calling her a 'penis'. I haven't used the word around my family since.

I wonder if my sister remembers me calling her a penis. I think I'll ask her next chance I get.

-Hans