Whitney Houston As A Divisive Figure

Whitney Houston is an irrevocably divisive figure. First, I think discussions like the one I will attempt to describe could only occur in college. Second, this is certainly based on a true story; you can't make up stuff like this.

What would you do to fill your days now if you had all the free time that you had in undergraduate school? I guess that's a question for another blog. When I think back I don't know what I did to keep myself busy. About three hours of class, certainly less than three hours of study, and... who knows. Eating. Drinking. Sitting around with a bunch of girls talking. Freshman year is a blur of girls. Even though I attended a large co-ed university, it seems like I seldom spent time alone, especially in the dorm. We traveled in packs - packs of roaming, vile freshmen girls constantly eating and talking, eating and talking.

The pack was hold up in a dorm room drinking and eating and talking and pretending to study. Somebody's mix cassette tape was spinning in the stereo and played Whitney Houston's "The Greatest Love of All". Everybody sang enthusiastically.

And then, unintentionally, I created a stir. I asked, "What is the greatest love of all?" I'm pretty sure I was thinking the greatest love of all was sleeping really late or eating ice cream. But this question stirred the pot, and got two friends embroiled into a great debate. For whatever reason, this exercise ended up prompting a hugely philosophical and religious conversation that split friends in two, like civil war, forevermore.

"Of course, the greatest love is the love of God," said one friend with much conviction.

"Come on. You haven't listened to the song. The greatest love is the love that you have for yourself," replied another equally passionate and outspoken pack member.

"So what you're saying is that you love yourself more than you love God?"

"No. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying it's two different things. The song is not talking about God. I'm telling you what I think the song is saying. That you have to love yourself or your can't really love anybody else."

"Then that is what you are saying. That you put another love above the love you have for God. I know the greatest love in my life is the love I have for Jesus Christ. That's a decision I made. And to put any other love above that... well, it's wrong."

"Listen, I'm not saying to put other loves before God. I'm saying that it's kind of all the same and you can't really separate it. If you don't really love yourself and respect yourself, then or you can't really love or respect anybody or anything else - including God. I mean, God made you. And if you don't love you, you start with nothing. And if you don't teach that to your kids, they won't have the self esteem they need."

"You're going to teach your kids that they should love themselves more than they love God? That they are first, and everything else is second?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying..."

And so it went. I don't remember how the debate finally ended. Things got uncomfortable for everyone as two people would not back away from their own very personal perspectives. I didn't want to further stir things, so I did not intervene or try to negotiate a truce; it seemed like that would make things worse.

In retrospect, I can see that one discussion started their relationship unraveling, the friendship never recovered, and they are no longer part of each others lives. At the time I could see the point each was trying desperately to make. I did not think that either was completely right or wrong. I surmised that some people are comfortable seeing shade of gray, and others are secure with seeing black or white, and a small question can stir a response that reveals the very essential nature of perhaps the greatest loves of your life.