Now a "Conversation" is usually two-way ----

Now a "conversation" is usually two-way arrangement. I am certain that this one was. It is the reply which I remember to this day.

As a somewhat rambunctious teenager, I was pushing my points to try to win my way over parental controls. There had been some of this, and my father (who actually turned out to be quite a philosopher in his own way) had this to say: "Now, you know that this household is not a democracy. It is a little like a benevolent dictatorship. I do think that you deserve to be heard. I will listen. If I am convinced, then I might change my mind. If I am not convinced, then my decision prevails. Are we clear about that?"

If you consider a disappointed nod a response, then this qualifies as the next statement in the "conversation".

"You see, he said, "I have to consider where you will be, who you will be with, what your transportation is, and with everything - - - whether this is a harmless activity, likely to be a harmless activity, or one which is apt present some problems. Most people your age, think they are capable of ascertaining all of those things. I don't blame you. I thought that when I was your age, too.

As I said before, please don't ever hesitate to talk to me about it. There might be something I'm missing. I'm willing to listen. But when all is said and done, I fully expect that you will abide by my decisions."

Well, there were a couple of other discussion-type questions and answers - and at last a decision. I don't even remember the decision. That was not the important part. The important win was a teen who had found an ear; one that would hear the whole deal, ask and answer questions and offer the respect he expected his child to earn.

Cat